Halloween Pussy Trap Kill! Kill!

And with that let the work begin!

Year Released : 2017

Director : Jared Cohn

Cast : Dave Mustaine, Richard Grieco, Sara Malakul Lane, Demetrius Stear, Lauren Parkinson, Nicole Sterling, Kelly Lynn Reiter, Kelly McCart and Tristan Ott

Every once in a while I am intrigued by a trailer and then when researching I see that it has a horrendous score on IMDB. One the exceptionally odd occasion I watch and disagree, but on the majority it is fully justified and I find myself fully anticipating the latter in relation to this movie. At the time of writing this movie has a score of 3.1/10 from 121 reviews on IMDB, and I suspect most of the higher scores come from cast and crew members.

Any film that has the same word twice in a five word title is fairly uncommon and odd, infact I can only think of one movie that does the same thing off of the top of my head (Space Babes from Outer Space), and I do like to review movies with the guts to do something that is odd in that sense.

I hope I am wrong and this will be half decent, but I get the feeling it won’t be.

Plot

During a tour of the Middle East three soldiers are captured and tortured. One (Mustaine) is left alive but has all of the skin on his face removed.

Several years later a female rock band called “Kill, Pussy, Kill” have just finished their concert and are due to head to their next venue when Speed (Stear) and Misty (McCart) are having sex in the back of a van when the latter suddenly changes her mind. Speed continues anyway and has to be stopped by the passing veteran. Even the rest of the band leave him there, but upon arriving at a gas station they are incapacitated by Dale (Grieco) and wake up in a warehouse.

The veteran says over the tannoy that if one of them kills any of the others then those still alive can progress, but failure to do so will see them all punished. As time goes on the tests get more extreme.

So is it better than the IMDB score suggests, or is it justified?

Last year the “Saw” franchise got the eighth installment and it is a series that gained heavy criticism as time went on. It became more about the gore than anything else and for me the fifth film, which has a similar theme to this film (people having to work as a team to progress to the next room, or be punished), was comfortably the worst of the lot. The reason I bring up the “Saw” franchise is that even though I absolutely hate the fifth one, it is a masterpiece compared to this clusterfuck of a film.

I don’t even know where to begin highlighting how bad this movie is. The acting is downright atrocious and it feels like something that you’d see in the bargain bin at Poundland one day, it’s that bad. Had there been a single original thought or concept in this mercifully short horror flick then I would have been able to overlook some of the more questionable aspects.

The plot doesn’t make a lot of sense and nor do the gore moments. For example, on at least two occasions characters suffer horrendous injuries (one has an eye removed with a stick and the other develops a huge cut during an acid attack) and yet neither seem to feel the pain. As soon as it has happened they just get on with things like nothing has been done to them. The make up that is intended to be blood more resembles raspberry jam that has been smeared all over them.

Now don’t get me wrong, I can forgive poor visuals in a low budget film, but to have your characters suffer injuries to that extent and not feel it literally seconds later is a joke. I’d love to know the thought process behind it. The plot is very contrived and full of convenience. For example, if they hadn’t stopped for fuel at the petrol station where Dale just happened to be at, what would have happened. It just seems to be random chance more than anything else and seems to have very little narrative consistency.

Summary

Poorly acted trash that I and at least 121 other unfortunate people have had to watch at the time of writing. This is bad.

I can’t really think of any positives for this and I will even go as far as saying that to call this a movie would be an insult to films. It’s definitely not the worst film I’ve seen whilst reviewing movies for this site, but it would certainly rank in a bottom ten if I were to spend time actually doing that (which I’m not).

Just avoid.

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